“The Trump Show” Returns
And it’s bigger and better than ever!
Come on, everyone—you’ve got to admit it: “The Trump Show” reboot is amazing!
When the show was canceled after that incredible climax—campaigning during the deadliest pandemic in a century; the title character succumbing to the virus in the campaign’s final five weeks; his narrow loss and then refusal to concede; insurrectionists storming the U.S. Capitol; a second-impeachment denouement that surpassed the vote total of the first but still fell agonizingly short of conviction—many thought we’d be left with nothing but fond memories of an incredible 5+-year run.
How wrong they were!
For a while, the return of the show for a second season seemed far-fetched. The star was getting so old. Plus, the extended first season was so absorbing and intense that some thought demand for more would wane. Hadn’t we all had enough? Didn’t we need to recover and then find something a little less agitating to fixate on?
Apparently not! I guess there really is no such thing as too much entertainment.
Yes, we need some variety, some new spin. But we also want fan-service, a reminder of what we hate-loved so much the first time.
And that’s exactly what the show-runners have concocted for us this time around. We’ve got the incendiary rallies filled with demagoguery and lies, along with outrageous tweet/truths from the former commander-in-chief. But this time we also have an unprecedented level of legal jeopardy. You mean Trump might actually run for and win the Republican nomination while on trial for multiple felonies in multiple jurisdictions? And he might keep right on running for president while on trial, even if he’s found guilty and sentenced to time in prison? Whoo-boy! This is going to be incredible, amirite?
I mean, sure, some of it is just a retread—the wall-to-wall coverage on cable news; the wall-to-wall denunciations of that coverage on Twitter; and, of course, the certainty as far as the eye can see in all directions.
The certainty might be familiar, but what the certainty concerns is something very different. This isn’t about alleged collusion between a presidential campaign and a hostile foreign government in order to manipulate the results of an election. It’s not even about the president attempting to strongarm the head of another foreign government into digging up dirt on his political rival. All that was great, but things are shaping up differently this time.
This time we’ve got certainty of Trump’s guilt and the righteousness of the charges. And certainty of Trump’s victimhood at the hands of a ruthless establishment that will stop at nothing to inflict punishment on the man who humiliated it. And certainty that Trump is a political loser and will be rendered an even bigger political loser by the charges. And certainty that the charges will ensure his political resurrection and vindication. And certainty that prosecuting him is demanded by the rule of law. And certainty that prosecuting him will shred the rule of law from here on out.
Which side will prevail? Whose certainty, if anyone’s, will be vindicated? Stay tuned to find out! (You know we will.)
But that’s far from the only thing making this such a thrilling spectacle. Get a load of the colorful new characters!
There’s Florida Governor Ron DeSantis—the presidential preference of conservative intellectuals at magazines and newspapers in both New York and Washington D.C. Will he be able to triumph over Trump despite currently being lapped by him in the polls and loudly proclaiming Trump’s innocence of all the charges? The tension’s gonna be excruciating!
There’s Georgia Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, Trump’s most steadfast defender. At first, she seemed a little too loopy for prime time, but thanks to the strenuous efforts of CBS News during the nearly-prime-time 7pm-hour last Sunday on 60 Minutes, she’s proven herself a real star! Trump 2.0’s VP, anyone?
And then there’s New York Rep. George Santos, an expert in the falsification of records, business and otherwise, who showed up outside the courthouse in lower Manhattan on Tuesday morning to show his support for the defendant in his time of trouble. What will his role in this saga turn out to be? I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to see!
And of course this is all just getting started. In addition to the 34 felony counts revealed Tuesday afternoon, there’s the Justice Department investigation of the classified documents the former president hid at Mar-a-Lago. And the same department’s investigation of Trump’s efforts to thwart the peaceful transfer of power following the 2020 election. And the investigation in Futon County, Georgia into alleged election fraud connected to Trump’s efforts to get Georgia’s secretary of state to “find” votes to reverse the outcome of the state’s vote count. And several other criminal and civil investigations into various Trump business practices.
That’s a lot for anyone, let alone someone running for president, to handle. Can Trump pull it off? That’s what every last one of us is eagerly waiting to see! I was skeptical at first, but all I know now is that I’m dying to learn what happens next. What will it be? How long will we have to wait before more days as thrilling as Tuesday? I don’t know about you, but the suspense is killing me!
In the meantime, we’ll have to make do with merch.
Love him or hate him, Trump is back, baby, and right where he belongs—at the very center of our public life and national consciousness. Time to really settle in for the show.
What is this post? Satire? An expression of contempt for what’s become of our politics? A cry of self-pity from someone who makes his living writing about it? I’m honestly not sure. All I know is that I needed to write something about Trump’s arraignment on Tuesday, and I couldn’t possibly do it straight. So what you got is this modest—and at best modestly amusing—post. I’ll be back on Friday with a lengthy essay about a movie classic.
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